The Manic Mind of a Traveler

Well this traveler anyway!  Most people have no idea where we are headed next, including us!  Here is a sampling of what a typical week is like in my mind.  It may shed some light on why we never quite know what we are doing next.  It goes something like this (and each week will be a new set of OMG this is an amazing idea)....

"You know Mexico looks amazing, so inexpensive, beautiful beaches, culture, we should go there!"  This starts the furious research.  Asking my travel friends all about the area, searching apartments and rental homes, head over to find cheap flights, look on a map to see what other countries are easy to get to in the region, Google image search the best beaches and there we go!  We are headed to Mexico!

I'll take the direct path to Paradise please!
Sounds like a done deal right?  It is in my mind, at that moment at least.  But not quite yet because you see at this point my manic travelers mind kicks in.  Someone mentions Ecuador and that seems interesting, I really want to be in South America ultimately anyway and Dylan's best friend from RaisingMiro lives close by so yeah, screw it, lets go there.  Begin research just like the above except for Ecuador and South rather than Central America.  Scratch my head, curse my friend for mentioning it, continue to research both now, and get depressed at my inability to decide between the two.  Oh and then there is Italy and...and...SQUIRREL..

Pathetic right, well wait it gets better.  Cue an amazing Hawaiian day, I mean a pinch yourself because everything is just perfect kind of day.  That's right I live in Hawaii and am constantly plotting for how to get outta here!  In reality, there have been a lot of those since landing in Hawaii, we love it here really, but paradise still has its issues.  Islands can feel extremely constricting and we have many personal issues surrounding living in the US.  When I remember that it's time to think it all through...yet again!  Maybe we should stay, maybe we should go.

Now if you've stuck with me this far perhaps you feel my pain!  I think this is a common thread for many travelers, but certainly not all of them.  Or maybe you have stayed to figure out what this girl is complaining about.  I understand that, I know it is a first world problem and even more than that it is a problem of my own making.  Things could be worse, I do not discount that, but I think it is worth discussing.

The root of the problem seems to be that once you open up the entire world as an option it becomes harder to decide.  When your mind is saturated with decisions to make it becomes overwhelming and nothing quite feels right.  There are pros and cons to nearly every location.  What seems like an easy decision to some, like our current Hawaii or Mexico conundrum, really holds a whole host of things to consider.  It is exhausting, exciting, and downright irritating, especially to those around you.  But the worst part about it is that you find yourself not living in the moment, not enjoying the amazing spot we are in and that just sucks!

When you do not place boundaries on yourself you end up incapable of deciding.  And at times you find yourself so busy plotting and planning that you miss living in the moment.  I love our life of freedom and enjoy being free to live where ever we feel fits us at the moment but with that freedom comes decisions and well I am flat out not good at deciding!

Not living in the moment is exactly where I found myself couple months ago when we landed on the Big Island and thought it might be the spot to settle down.  I have done this to myself in the past and I knew this time I needed to find a way to cope better so that I could enjoy each and every moment of this wonderful life.

It has been a tough transition for me moving to a slower travel pace.  Some in the family want to settle down, me included some days.  There is a lot to be said for that, consistent friends, your own things, a full kitchen, pets, the list is quite long but I still can't quite wrap my mind around it. 

What I have realized over the past few months though is that I really need to live in the moment and I can with some simple daily routines.  I constantly remind myself that nothing is permanent so even if I decide and then everything changes it really is just fine.  Our life necessitates at least for now that we move a bit and that requires choices and a bit of planning but it does not dictate the way we choose to spend our days or the way we react to those choices.

Constantly planning the next step of our journey left me missing the journey itself.  What is the point in that?  So I decided to choose to be content, practice a gratitude meditation for a few minutes every morning and treat every day like the vacation that I molded my life into being.  After all, it is all about the journey right?  The destination is awesome but the journey is what makes or breaks you, places you outside of your comfort zone and changes your perspective on everything.

I must admit that I am still a manic minded traveler, but at least now I have found a way to be content, present, and enjoy every moment good or bad!  Well almost every moment, hey, its a work in progress!

Do you struggle with decision making or living in the moment?  What do you do to stay content and present?


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10 comments:

  1. Love this Mary. I also try to do a few minutes of gratitude each morning and night. My mind is always in the future, especially when it comes to making money and where I want to travel to next. I really have to be mindful about staying in the moment and enjoying where I am even if the future is uncertain.

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    1. Thanks, practicing gratitude has really helped. I looked at all the different religions and realized that the calls to prayer, the praying at night, meditating and chanting is all really just a practice in gratitude. Imagine the benefit of doing that 5x a day regardless of what is going on, just stopping and taking a moment to be grateful for something. Could be a whole new world:)

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  2. The decision paralysis of true freedom. Know it well! Ugh!

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    1. Exactly! On one hand I am incredibly grateful for the freedom that allows me this type of predicament but on the other hand I am really sick of this predicament!

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  3. I love this post, I often feel the same. Everybody wants to have freedom but to live free is challenging.

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    1. Yes! I hate to complain about it but it shows that no lifestyle, no choice, nothing is paradise or perfect!

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  4. Yeah - why of why did we set ourselves up like this to have so many choices! lol

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  5. So true. Goodness it's nice to know I'm not the only "flaky" one out there (as I believe I have been identified as:) I have young adult children who have grown up with this moving and they are similar. Not sure if that is a bad thing to pass on but it's better than some things. We have been living in Dubai for 1.3 months and I love it. But what is next? Two months of traveling this summer will help.

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    1. I hear that, I also think many think I am flaky or flat out crazy! I think wanderlust is a great thing to pass on!

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